To Gain Insight, Ask Questions
Leaders today need to continuously adapt to changing circumstances and stay aware of their impact through ongoing feedback. Research has found that the self-aware leader is also more aware of others. The best way to build this awareness is to stay curious, ask questions, and let the people around you offer insight. Trying to develop without feedback it is like trying to see with your eyes closed.
Organizations understand the value of feedback—it’s why 360 degree survey tools have become a billion dollar industry. But formal tools can’t replace the insights you can gather by through simple dialogue. Two-way communications allows you to clarify questions and probe for better understanding. The conversation itself, when properly managed, can help you resolve conflicts, build trust and strengthen your relationships.
Begin by identifying peers, direct reports, and leaders above you who can offer observations on your leadership behaviors. Ask them to share their perceptions. Keep the interaction informal and casual. If you’ve set this up as a feedback meeting, begin by thanking the person for taking the time and limit the meeting to no more than 30 minutes. With a few carefully crafted questions, you can get the conversation started. Be sure to welcome—and listen to—all suggestions. If something seems off-base to you, thank the person anyway and let them know you’ll think about it. Avoid the trap of justifying or disagreeing. Once you put their feedback into practice, call or email the person to let them know how they’ve helped you. Managers come to work in order to contribute. Your thanking them will encourage them to continue being candid. . This is how you build trust and develop mentors who will ultimately become sponsors.
Here is a list of feedback questions that you can use to start the conversation:
What are the first three words that come to mind to describe me as a leader?
What is a strength you see in me and the way I lead?
What’s a strength you’d like me to express more?
When have you seen me demonstrating leadership? What was it that I did?
What is an opportunity for me to develop my leadership further?
Have you seen me miss opportunities to demonstrate leadership?
What’s a strength in our relationship? How would you like to see our relationship change?
What’s a strength I bring to managing change?
What’s a challenge of mine in managing change?
How can I support you? (With directs ask this three times because they will hesitate to tell you what they really need, e.g. “How can I support you?” “How else can I support you?”
· “Is there something else I can support you with?”
Who do you know who can help me with… ? (This is a great question that opens the door to other mentors and builds your network of allies!)
Get into the habit of asking questions as they occur to you even outside of these dialogue sessions. Staying curious is a key leadership skill you learn by doing. Ask questions, listen carefully, and write down what you learn so you remember. You’ll discover more than you expect while creating allies who feel valued by your interest and help you become a better leader.